Salmonella

With my medical background I get really nervous working with raw chicken. But sometimes I’m like, “Well a little salmonella poisoning could be good for the waistline…”

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Best Toy for Christmas

The toddler of the house has been talking about this toy at her new preschool that she just has to have for Christmas.

It’s been described to me as, “2 fuzzy heads that you put tiny colored fuzzy squished balls in and then they fall out!” Apparently this is SO HILARIOUS!

Finally after scouring the world wide internet to no avail, I got the bright idea to follow kid into preschool and have her show me said wonder toy!

Brilliant, ey?

Behold, 2017’s Christmas must have toy:

Save your pennies folks!

Eyes

When I was ten I was convinced my mom had eyes in the back of her head. I'd stick my tongue out at her when I was positive she wasn't looking, yet she would know.

Now that I'm a mom, I realize that it's just something moms know. I know when my kid rolls her eyes at me. I can almost hear them roll to the very back of her pretty head.

Lord knows I don't have eyes in the back of my head. But I found this one on my butt today:

10 Is my Favorite Number 

Screaming first breaths and counting tiny toes

10 is my favorite number
“Line up on your number, children,” first day of school

10 is my favorite number 
Toeing the line between tom-girl and heels

10 is my favorite number
“Ugh mom, no one else has a curfew on the weekends!”

10 is my favorite number
Tear of joy

Run, twirl

Stop and think

Rinse and repeat
From beginning to end

My little girl forever 

But for now,

10 is my favorite number 

Signs. Signs.

Everywhere.

Baby et al. sees this sign and translates it as, “a mommy can have a purse, but daddy’s can have purses too.”

Um baby, the pc term is messenger bag, but whatevs.

Also I feel the need to mention that hubby et al. doesn’t carry a messenger bag…although there’s nothing wrong with them!

Mother Nature is a Democrat

I think Mother Nature is trying to say something to President Trumpor to next President Pence. 

I can say these things because I am a republican.