Memorial Day

First, let me start off by saying that I am so very thankful that men and women fought so hard for our freedom. To know so many soldiers died while fighting that battle, is devastating. I wish I could personally thank each person for being braver, stronger, smarter than myself.

Then I think about my dad. About my cousins. My grandpas. All who fought in war and survived war and I can’t help but be a little pissed. A cousin and my dad have been formally diagnosed with PTSD. One of my grandfathers left war as an alcoholic that plagued him until his death. 

The most bravest people in my world left war with invisible wounds. Wounds that our VA hospitals are ill equipped to deal with. My dads PTSD was so severe at one point that we started consulting inpatient treatment centers. Guess how difficult it is to find a VA hospital for inpatient PTSD. Why isn’t millions of dollars are not invested into soldier PTSD? 

It should be assume that everyone coming out of war has PTSD and should be treated accordingly. It has to become so routine in the healthcare system to treat wartime soldiers for PTSD that all stigmas attached to mental health, are gone. 

My dad’s symptoms have improved so much. He was never able to go to inpatient treatment. He was placed on a waiting list and the director of the program told me something that will always haunt my dreams.

“We prioritize Gulf War/War on Terror survivors. Because suicide rates amoung this population is insurmountable”

Because men and women who come home from war now, come home with PTSD so severe that they choose to end their lives. They fight and make it home only to die at their own hand. And here I sit. In my safe, comfy bed. My heart hurts for them, for my loved ones, for those suffering. 

He’s Lost His Eff-ing Mind

Being in the medical field, people I know often come to me with health related questions. Sometimes I can tell people are using me to gauge how crazy their symptoms are before they go to their real healthcare provider. And by “people”….I mean my husband.  

First off, I’m about 2 classes and 100 clinical hours short of my PEDIATRIC nurse practitioner degree. My husband does not fall into the pediatric specially or that would be super creepy. Today he tells me, “so sometimes my left knee feels wet. Not all over, just like a 2cm square area.” 


In pediatrics, if a child tells me their left knee feels wet, there’s a 99.99999% chance this child has what is called “grabaShoutWipeSTATbecausethiskidhastheREDcherryjuiceboxtheywerejustdrinkingontheirleftkneeseriouslywhoinventedjuicebox-itis”. 

But my husband can usually handle his juice boxes without spilling so I needed to dig deep into my nursey nurse brain for this one! I’m relatively sure he’s going to make it through the night.

In his defense, the first time I met him I told him he had cancer. Not in those exact words. In these exact words. He had a sore on his eye and he says to me.

Him-“Don’t mind my eye, I’ve had this sty for like a year now.”

Me-“Oh really?” First date, mind you. Met on a dating website, first time seeing him in person.

Him-“Yea sometimes I think I pick it in my sleep because it will like bleed or scab over or something, but it just never heals.” And all the nurses reading this sing in harmony (B🎶C🎶C)

Me-(realizing he had asked me on this date because he knows I’m a nurse and he wants my opinion on his eye) “So have you talked to your doctor about it?”

Him-“No, do you think it’s something big? Like it’s not cancer…… it?”

Me-He’s cute, I better use nice but strong words so he goes to the doctor and gets this taken care of. “There’s no way of knowing without a biopsy of the area, which would have to be done by your doctor. But this is a valid symptom your healthcare provider would want to see you about.”

Btw, telling a guy to get his basal cell carcinoma taken care of can earn you some brownie points cause that boy put a ring on it!

 Do yourself a favor and Google sty. I like how the Internet is moving away from the basic race and gender neutral stock photo people. But this guys creator could have dialed down the stalker/hitchhiker look just a smidge. 

I’m Fat

So I heard recently that the artist Pink had gained some weight. She responded via Twitter with a story retelling an interaction between herself and her daughter where her little girl asked her, “mommy why are you so squishy?” She responded with, “b/cuz I’m happy baby” I can relate to that statement with the every inch of my soul (minus the way she spelled because.) I don’t share this with many people but I spent a good portion of my teens and early twenties testing out bulimia and anorexia. If you could see me now, I assume you would laugh at that statement because I look like the worse eating disorder gal EVER! Those were my dark years. I cry just trying to remember the pain I felt for all those years counting bites and calories and exercising till I vomited. Hoping my heart would just stop while I was sleeping. Praying those 10 Benadryl I had left would work their magic if I took them all at once.

I fear backsliding into that, so I don’t run. Because I don’t trust myself to know where the line between healthy and unhealthy are. I don’t count calories because then I cut them until I’m down to a celery only diet. I tired Weight Watchers and I would beat myself up if I ever ate my daily allowance of point. I don’t trust how good I was at keeping those secrets.

Pregnancy was hard. I wanted to eat healthy for my babies and every bite was emotional. I’ve been pregnant twice and gained 19lbs the first time and 7lbs the second time. Which is good for a woman who is overweight. My babies were healthy sized, both were a few weeks early but they were home by one week old!

So here I am. Fat….and happy. I get it Pink! I don’t have starvation migraines! I don’t secretly run to the bathroom after meals. I don’t hate myself. I look in the mirror and tell myself, “My gosh Her et al. you’re fat! But that smile is to die for.” To be able to say my smile is to die for and not think that a stick figure is “to die for” (figuratively and literally) is my success story. 

Am I healthy? Not 100% I’d guess. My fasting labs are fine. My HDL could always be higher, but it’s within range. My blood pressure is good and I am currently not depressed! I want to scream it from the mountain tops. I rejoice and thank God I don’t hurt like that anymore. Squishy feels good.

Princess Kate Had Her Baby

Hear ye! Hear ye! I’d like to remind everyone that even princesses have to deal with the 1st postpartum poop. 

Now, why is it NO one warns of this before you have a baby? For some reason, mothers seem to think it’s their right to scare the crap out of first time pregnant mommys with horror stories. “The baby can get stuck on its way out and they have to push the baby back in, run you to surgery, cut you from hip to hip, and rip your baby out!” But that rarely happens. Now the postpartum poop, that happens to EVERYONE! Including princesses.

I assume her mesh panties are couture and hold hand woven pads larger than her newborns diapers. Probably Jenny Packham also!

Heres a link to buy your own since I’m a good blogger and that’s what we do.

Super Lotion

I’m making some Super Lotion today! I repost it every so often so I can find it!

I stumbled upon this handy dandy recipe off of a blog about a year so ago, and I’m afraid I’m unable to remember who or where I got it from. Since making it, a few of my friends have said their grandmothers use to make something similar. At our crib, we refer to this lotion as “Super Lotion” because it’s made up of several different products you can find at your local drugstore and it is our “go to” lotion for the girls in the winter. In the summers, I use this more since I shave every day, plus it’s bare skin season. 

Additionally, I’ve used it on our toddler who has eczema and it works wonders with her.  I’m not sure that it works better than the old Cetaphil, but it certainly smells prettier! Now in full disclosure, if you have sensitive skin and you try this lotion and then break out or develop a rash afterwords, your healthcare provider will likely tell you to discontinue this lotion as it does have a scent. If you have a child with eczema I’m sure you already know that effective treatments vary from person to person and are trial and error kind of basis. 

Now let’s begin the goodness:

I use my handy-dandy stand mixer with my paddle attachment. My paddle has a rubber edge that scrapes the bowl so I don’t have to! Really I’m not quite sure how to do it without a stand mixer but do your thing.


  1. 15 oz pink Johnson’s baby lotion (brand only)
  2. 3/4 cup Vaseline (generic works)
  3. 1 capful of vitamin E oil
  4. 4oz Fruit of the Earth vitamin E Skincare Cream (I’ve never been able to find the cream in my town, but I have ordered it off Amazon. I’ve used the FOTE vitamin E Lotion and it works just as good)
  5. (Optional)-Hydrocortisone Cream 1%, 1 tube-I added this when my youngest eczema is at its worse and then the lotion is even more super! But obviously this is an optional step based on your needs

Directions: Pour everything in your stand mixer, turn it on a medium speed and let it go for a few minutes.

Pretty soon it will start to look fluffy and pink, so don’t leave it unattended in the stand mixer or some poor unsuspecting loved one make dip a finger in thinking its frosting.

When it’s done, fill up the bottles you’ve just used (use a gallon bag with a clipped corner as a pipping bag to fill bottles) and your good to go!

You’ll need one other bottle your first time making this because you’re adding the Vaseline and vitamin E oil.